Yea doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ. (Philippians 3:8)
A full relationship with God requires the surrender of all things. This stout principle is stated plainly over and over again in scripture. Few encounter a full relationship with God, because few understand or submit fully in surrender to God.
There are three levels of surrender to God. The first is partial surrender, when you are willing to surrender a specific thing or a group of specific things. Many people in this group are honest enough to recognize that their unsurrendered things should be surrendered, but they love those things too much to let go of them. Their unwillingness to let go of these things in spite of a commandment from God to do so means that they love these things more than God, which is a violation of the first and great commandment: Love God with all your heart (see Matthew 22:38). Their withholdings are an idol to them, and as long as they hold onto these unsurrendered things, they cannot have a full relationship with God. No matter what positive experiences they have with God, they will be forever blocked from the much greater portion they were meant to experience.
Some less honest people in this group think that their unsurrendered list is acceptable to God because it is comprised only of things they think God will never expect them to surrender. Who are you to dictate what is right and what is wrong to God? If your operating assumption is that you are fallen and incapable of saving yourself, how could you ever think that you are capable of dictating what God can and can’t do? God’s humbling interchange with Job fits any who think for a moment that their wisdom exceeds God’s (see Job 38). The Lord’s ways are higher than yours:
8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord.
9 For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. (Isaiah 55:8-9)
When it comes to what God might ask of us, there are no limitations. Abraham probably thought God would never ask him to sacrifice a human, let alone his son, let alone the son whose life was required to fulfill promises he had received from God. And yet, he did not withhold Isaac. There are many other examples in the scriptures. Nothing is out of bounds. Even your relationship with your parents and your children are among what he can ask you to sacrifice:
He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. (Matthew 10:37)
If any [man] come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple. (Luke 14:26
Sacrifice is something that God can ask of you over anything, at any time. He described this as taking up your cross. It is required, and is required daily:
And whosoever doth not bear his cross, and come after me, cannot be my disciple. (Luke 14:27)
And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me. (Luke 9:23)
Ironically, those who put God in a box do so out of fear. They fear that if they let God out of their boxes, he would end up less loving, less merciful, or less good than they presently imagine him to be. That is ironic because it is only by removing your limitations of him that you can see just how loving, merciful, and good he really is. Trusting him provides the opportunity for him to prove his faithfulness and love. It far exceeds anything you can imagine when you box him up in false traditions. If you look at every person in the scriptures who came to know God, you will struggle to find someone who found him less godly upon getting to know him. Instead, you see the opposite. You see deep, loving, worshipful reverence increase in proportion to how well someone knows God.
Putting God in a box does not protect you from disappointment. Anytime we impede God’s will in our lives, we willingly limit the amount of love he can show to us. You may have experienced God in some way—spiritual gifts, revelation, joy, or even visitations—but your experiences are limited and diminished compared to what he could give you if you would unconditionally trust in him.
In the scriptures, there are those who had miracles, those who had revelation, those that experienced great joy, those that saw him, even those that touched him. But of those who experienced God in some way, how many were able to abide in his glory? The answer is surprisingly few. With almost every experience, he held something back, sometimes considerably so. Every commandment you refuse to consider diminishes your potential glory, but it also diminishes the quantity of the Lord's glory you are able to abide. For each thing "your God would never ask you to do," you remove yourself from the opportunity to experience that much more of him.
Instead of seeing any potential sacrifice as off limits to God, you should recognize those things as the limits of your trust in God. Changing the focus is not only more honest, but serves to outline where you need to change. You should repent, and come to the point where you are willing to put everything on the altar.
God has never given you a reason to doubt him. In all his interactions, he has faithfully honored your trust in him. Why hesitate to give him whatever he asks? He loves you and will never ask of you what is not in your best interest to give. When you choose to lay aside what you think you know about God, and instead ask him about the things you fear, he will take away your fear by revealing to you a greater depth of his love, perfection, mercy, and glory than you ever comprehended. With each revelation, your trust in him will increase until it is unshakeable. Perfect love removes all fear. If you truly love God, then seek to know him on his terms, holding nothing back. Only those who put everything they think they know about God on the altar can come to know him.
The second level of surrender is surrender in all things that you know of. This is the category all Christians should strive to reside in. This is where you can say with an honest heart that you have complied with every request God has made of you. This is the place you need to be in order to experience a more significant relationship with God than what is available to those who hold back. Yet, even in this category, you have not achieved a full relationship with God. As you progress with God in this category, he will show you things you have not previously considered, and you will realize that you still have corners of your heart that you have not surrendered to him.
A wonderful example of this principle is given by the interaction of a rich young man with the Lord Jesus:
17 And when he was gone forth into the way, there came one running, and kneeled to him, and asked him, Good Master, what shall I do that I may inherit eternal life?
18 And Jesus said unto him, Why callest thou me good? there is none good but one, that is, God.
19 Thou knowest the commandments, Do not commit adultery, Do not kill, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Defraud not, Honour thy father and mother.
20 And he answered and said unto him, Master, all these have I observed from my youth.
21 Then Jesus beholding him loved him, and said unto him, One thing thou lackest: go thy way, sell whatsoever thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come, take up the cross, and follow me.
22 And he was sad at that saying, and went away grieved: for he had great possessions. (Mark 10)
The rich young ruler thought he had sacrificed everything, but he hadn’t. Jesus helped him see what more he had to do. There were more commandments that he was not yet aware of. We also think we are done far before we actually are. You aren’t there until you are actually there, and if you quit, you’ll never experience the promised blessings. Those who approach God can count on new commandments. They can count on being asked to sacrifice in ways they did not expect. If they already knew and did everything that was required, they would already possess the relationship they seek.
Be prepared for paradigm shifts. In order to take us higher, God has to rip out our foundations. He purges the vine before it can bear more fruit:
1 I am the true vine, and my Father is the husbandman.
2 Every branch in me that beareth not fruit he taketh away: and every branch that beareth fruit, he purgeth it, that it may bring forth more fruit. (John 15)
God will teach and call to further repentance everyone who comes to him. That is his mission, to bring men higher than they are.
What is called the “Abrahamic sacrifice” is actually not one sacrifice, but many successive sacrifices that come one after another as we obey what God asks at any given time. Abraham’s sacrifice of Isaac was critical, but it wasn’t the first time Abraham was tried. Abraham was tried as a child when he was assigned to guard his idol-maker father's wares and chose to destroy them. He was tried when exposed to textual accounts of Shem, Noah, and the fathers and their experiences with God. He recognized that his father's religion was inferior, and chose to believe there was something better. He was tried when he endured his father’s hand among those who sought to sacrifice him, and tried when he had the opportunity to forgive him. He was tried when commanded to leave his home in Ur. He was tried when his father and brother—whom he had rescued through his own merits and mercy—turned away from him. He was tried when his wife was taken by a rich and powerful ruler—twice—for long periods of time without his knowledge of her condition or any likelihood that she would come back to him. He was tried when he took Hagar to wife. He was tried when his marriages were ravaged by the jealousy of Sarah. He was tried when God told him that his beloved son Ishmael would not be his heir. He was tried when Lot, whom he had sacrificed so much for, selfishly chose the better section of land at their parting, revealing Lot’s persisting weaknesses in spite of Abraham’s sacrifices on his behalf. He was tried when he went into battle to rescue Lot. He was tried when he parted ways with Ishmael and Hagar. And finally, he was tried when he was asked to sacrifice Isaac.
Sacrifice is not an event, but a process. While it almost always includes giving something up, it frequently includes taking on something new. These things are not always material objects. They frequently include letting go of treasured traditions or taking on new beliefs. The goal of that process is to successively increase your trust in God until you are willing to yield completely to him without exception. This is the same as saying that you would do anything he might command, no matter what it is. This is the same as saying there is nothing that you would not do if he commanded it.
The third level of surrender is surrender in all things known and unknown. This is the point we must reach to have the full relationship with God that he intended for us. In this stage, your trust for God is so great that there is nothing he could ask you to do—whether you’ve considered it or not— that you would not do. At this point, your obedience to him is not a function of your experience or knowledge. No matter what he reveals to you, you will obey. Whereas level two is a case-by-case basis, dependent on the specific sacrifice, level three is total and final.
Surrender of all things is described by Paul as being crucified in the flesh: “And they that are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.” (Galatians 5:24) The person who reaches this point has subdued all their desires to God’s will. The Lord described total submission as losing one’s life: “He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it.” (Matthew 10:39) Crucifixion is not temporary or by degrees. It is total, and it is final. When you lose your life, you are not merely setting aside a part of it. The cost is incredible. It is total. Realizing this is an important distinction between the second and third levels of sacrifice:
28 For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have sufficient to finish it?
29 Lest haply, after he hath laid the foundation, and is not able to finish it, all that behold it begin to mock him,
30 Saying, This man began to build, and was not able to finish.
31 Or what king, going to make war against another king, sitteth not down first, and consulteth whether he be able with ten thousand to meet him that cometh against him with twenty thousand?
32 Or else, while the other is yet a great way off, he sendeth an ambassage, and desireth conditions of peace.
33 So likewise, whosoever he be of you that forsaketh not all that he hath, he cannot be my disciple. (Luke 14)
Crucifying the flesh has an enormous cost, but it also provides an uncountable blessing. You can’t inherit the glory of the ancients without making the same degree of sacrifice of the ancients. When you make the same degree of sacrifice as the ancients, God—who is no respecter of persons—will reward you with the same experiences as the ancients. Those who are willing to lose their life will save it, or receive full communion with God:
Verily, verily, I say unto you, Except a corn of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abideth alone: but if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit. (John 12:24)
When we reach this point, we have lost our lives because we no longer live for ourselves, but for God:
I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me. (Galatians 2:20)
Real sacrifice is a response to God’s requests. It is not simply inventing things that make our lives more difficult. We cannot live through God while still pursuing our own agenda, even if that agenda causes personal suffering. Sacrifices that we invent are not from God. Cain invented a sacrifice and despite it being similar to the sacrifice God ordained, it was rejected by God. Saul performed the same sacrifice as Samuel, but it was rejected by God. In both cases, there were extreme consequences for their offering sacrifices that were not requested from God:
And Samuel said, Hath the LORD as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the LORD? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to hearken than the fat of rams. (1 Samuel 15:22)
Do not succumb to the temptation to invent ways to punish yourself in order to distract you from the real sacrifice God is asking of you. If you do, you will either find yourself without the progress you could have by focusing on God, or you will find yourself retrograding when your sacrifice does not result in any spiritual progress. God’s path is hard enough—you don’t have to invent things to make it more difficult. Instead, use that energy to ask him what he wants you to do, and do it.
A full relationship with God requires full trust in God. You can’t hold anything back. God will require of you anything you haven’t already given him. It is total submission no matter what God may ask of you. Submission is a perishable status. We must die daily to the Lord!