Once, there was a promising young woman who was hired as an intern by an insightful boss who saw that she had tremendous potential and wanted to give her the opportunity to leap forward into a much better career than she would otherwise obtain.
The duties and purpose of the position were clearly explained the first day. Nevertheless, the woman brought with her the well-established habit of constantly using her phone. She could not accomplish much, because the benefits of the job consisted of solving deep, creative problems that required one's full attention. The boss gently suggested she use more discipline in her phone use, learning to only use it when it helped her accomplish more and better work, for that was the job she agreed to, and that was what would determine her ability to stay and obtain raises.
Instead of listening, the woman maintained her previous phone habits. When she was finally fired, she was angry and upset, and feigned disbelief. She said things such as, "I don't understand why you didn't warn me that if I didn't stop using my phone, you would fire me." The boss said, "I did warn you, many more times than I should have had to. What exactly did you expect me to say, that I didn't already say multiple times?"
This story happens to be true, but there are many such people in this precise situation today, and many more who are in situations like this, especially when you consider your relationship with God.
I hear from people who act surprised that they have not yet received the baptism of fire. I simply ask them this: When was the last time you willingly did less than your best in anything? Without fail, their answer can be measured in days or less. While you still remember the last time you willingly rebelled against God (and yes, these are the same thing), how can you wonder why you have not received a blessing reserved for those who have surrendered to God? Besides, why are you so focused on an event? Those who truly love God would and do love him even if and when they are cast into the depths of hell. The experiences and the circumstances are irrelevant, no matter how intense they might be. The love of God is not consummated when we allow him access to our hearts but when, through continuous and faithful allegiance through consecutive and successive refining trials, he has purged enough of our dross that we begin to reflect his attributes in ourselves.
Are you attempted to stand in two different places at the same time? Are you working for glory of God with full purpose of heart, or are you trying to solve hard problems while checking your phone every two minutes?
Wherefore, my beloved brethren, I beseech of you in words of soberness that ye would repent, and come with full purpose of heart, and cleave unto God as he cleaveth unto you. And while his arm of mercy is extended towards you in the light of the day, harden not your hearts. (Jacob 6:5)
Wherefore, my beloved brethren, I know that if ye shall follow the Son, with full purpose of heart, acting no hypocrisy and no deception before God, but with real intent, repenting of your sins, witnessing unto the Father that ye are willing to take upon you the name of Christ, by baptism—yea, by following your Lord and your Savior down into the water, according to his word, behold, then shall ye receive the Holy Ghost; yea, then cometh the baptism of fire and of the Holy Ghost; and then can ye speak with the tongue of angels, and shout praises unto the Holy One of Israel. (2 Nephi 31:13)
There are times coming in which you will absolutely require a stronger relationship with God. If you do not prepare, you are going to find yourself suddenly in situations that far exceed your ability to cope.
But if ye will turn to the Lord with full purpose of heart, and put your trust in him, and serve him with all diligence of mind, if ye do this, he will, according to his own will and pleasure, deliver you out of bondage. (Mosiah 7:33)
O ye house of Israel whom I have spared, how oft will I gather you as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings, if ye will repent and return unto me with full purpose of heart. (3 Nephi 10:6)
These changes are not some foreign or extreme thing. They are principally found in simply developing the willingness to frequently ask yourself what would be of most benefit, and then go and do that thing. The voice of God is the voice of improvement. Think about what he would do in your place, and do it. And, along the way, learn as much as you can about him and about all things to improve your ability to accurately imagine what he would do in your place.
It is at once both the simplest and hardest thing to do. But you know the way, and if you choose not to follow it, it is because you choose not to, not because you can't do it.
I encourage you to lay beside all those petty things that beset you. Stop looking at Jesus out of the corner of your eye. Stop looking at the floor as he stands before you. Stare him right in the face, as terrifying as that may be for now. There is no better place you can look, and no better place you can be than whatever circumstances in which he has placed you.
God loves you more than you can presently understand, and more than you can presently bear. Place your full intent in him, and your full trust in him, and he will lead you along to the point where you can bask in his goodness to ends that you cannot presently imagine.
I have done what I am preaching, and while I do not have the ability to convey these things in writing, I can certify from my own experience that what I am telling you is true. In my own literal experience, I'm not sure there is any greater joy than to look into the eyes of the Lord and feel his joy when you finally listened to him for long enough and through hard enough processes that he can finally take you to much greater things.
You can do this. Do it.